High highs, low lows
Embracing an unfiltered life
I used to LOVE (all caps needed) Instagram.
Loved scrolling. Loved posting. Loved filtering life’s moments with Instagram’s aesthetic standard in mind. Wondering “is this Insta-worthy or not?” and knowing that I could just crop this here, and brighten that a little there, and…you know what? We’re putting this shit in black and white.
Ah. Total. Perfection.
But then a donut happened.
Well, actually. Me being a total phony happened.
It was just a totally shit day. Eight years ago. Nothing particularly bad happened. I just wasn’t “feeling it.” Let’s be real and call a spade a spade - I was being a big ol’ whiny buttface. Feeling bad for myself that my life wasn’t more “extra” and so I decided to fix that.
I decided to have an Insta-worthy moment. Come hell or high water.
So, I drove my down-in-the-dumps behind to some fancy schmancy donut shop in South Minneapolis. Bought a pink donut with rainbow sprinkles along with a cappuccino topped with the classic barista heart masterpiece. Found a seat by the window facing the street. Placed a book I had no intention of reading on the table.
Arranged donut, cappuccino and book just right.
Snapped a pic. Witty caption added. Maybe some hashtags.
And voila!
“Look at me having a hell of a time with my perfect beverage and perfect sweet treat. Reading my perfect novel. In this perfect seat. Overlooking this perfect downtown.”
Ready for this?
Not only was that photo a complete misrepresentation of how I was feeling.
The donut sucked.
This was a defining moment for me. My misery was hidden with perfect photographic editing.
I could make you think I was on top of the world when I was really down in the pits. Right frame. Right filter. Right capture.
This is one of the (numerous) reasons I decided to kick social media (except LinkedIn - work necessity).
Flash forward to yesterday and I would find myself, eight years later, again eating donuts and again feeling down in the dumps, and again thinking about cropping out all the un-gram-orous stuff that lie before me.
Yesterday, I woke up in Candler, NC (about 15 minutes outside of Asheville). Looking out the window of the Airbnb, I was so awestruck by the beauty of the mountains. Mountains everywhere. BTW John Denver wasn’t lying or color blind for that matter - those Blue Ridge Mountains really are blue!
But, zoom that camera out and…
Broken down cars. Cars that look like they’ve kissed one too many guardrails. I’ve never seen so many cars without grills. It’s like ‘The Curious Case of the Missing Front End.’ Sitting idle in driveways and parking lots and on roadsides. All waiting for some nice tow truck to whisk them off to their final resting spot.
Two doors down there’s a house that looks like it should/could/was on an episode of Hoarders. Bags and bags full of cans and other garbage spilled out and around it. There’s no windows. And right out front is a truck whose tailgate looks to have been karate chopped by a giant and is also piled high with trash.
It’s rough. And it’s everywhere. And it got to me.
I felt a bit culture shocked. And then I felt depressed. And so we bought donuts.
And it was while I was eating one of my baker’s half dozen that I was struck by the memory of my former self. Similarly struggling with the ugliness that life presents us with. And similarly eating a donut.
Eight years ago I chose to slap a filter and caption on it. Believing that if the outside world thought I was having a bomb-ass time, then surely that was good enough.
Today, I woke up and decided not to filter or crop or caption. Instead, I would wrestle with the emotions as they came and the newness of what lies before me. And I would welcome in both the beautiful and the ugly. The views of gorgeous mountain ranges and of cars missing front ends.
High highs. Low lows.
Real life.
Real America.
No camera filter here.
—Lauren
Cupalo Conversations Podcast 🎙️:
🎥 Watch on YouTube:
🎧 Listen on Spotify:
In this fun and yet sobering episode of the Cupalo Conversations podcast, host Lauren Hannon sits down with Joe Coulter, a senior underwriter with over 15 years of experience and more than 10,000 mortgage loans under his belt. Together, they explore the often hidden truths about how Americans—both average and affluent—really manage their money.
From paycheck-to-paycheck living in multi-million-dollar homes to the common mistakes people make with cash-out refinances, Joe pulls back the curtain on the financial habits that most of us don’t talk about with friends such as... How even those with $100,000+ monthly paychecks may be one missed payment away from returning their luxury cars.
Meme of the Week:
Overdoing it at the company picnic...
Job Search Resources:
Ready to land a $200k - $500k+ tech job and build a meaningful career? CareerSprout has helped 700+ people land $200k – $500k+ jobs, working for a company they admire, doing something they love, setting themselves up for future growth. Book a call with them here and be sure to tell them Lauren/Cupalo sent you!
With thousands of applicants per job, do you feel invisible?
Skip Round will equip you with the tools to make an impact by crafting personalized applications plus AI coaching to ace your interviews with confidence.Job Seekers – use Coupon CUPALO20 for 20% off FOREVER
Monthly Subscription - $99
Annual Subscription - $599
Growth Seekers – use Coupon CUPALO20 for 20% off FOREVER
One-time report - $99
How To Start a Staffing Company
In my course How to Start a Staffing Company, you'll learn all the crap I wish I knew before I started down this road (and then some).
Deep breath, which clearly you're doing. I've eaten more than a dozen of those donuts in my lifetime. And suspect more are awaiting me. I'll pull out my rose-colored glasses and just be thankful for all I have. Forge ahead! xx